Infertility doesn’t define you, it’s just part of you. It sure as heck wasn’t invited and has definitely overstayed it’s welcome. It’s a small part that brings the what if’s, the self-doubt, the worry, and the anxiety to the party.
Never apologize for this part of you. Don’t be sorry for having to struggle with Infertility. Never apologize that on some days you can’t muster a smile and be optimistic. Never apologize for feeling really angry and bitter. Never apologize for putting your dreams of a baby ahead of anything else right now. Never apologize for taking care of yourself and your health. Never apologize for not being there for other people as you grieve or heal. Just because they might not understand doesn’t mean you aren’t entitled to this time. There is no time frame you need to meet or feel like you have to get to. Never apologize for protecting yourself from triggers, even if that means people you love and places. Never apologize for not sharing emotionally with everyone. A. Not everyone deserves that part of you. B. Not everyone wants to authentically help or understand, they will just be curious. There’s a difference. Don’t apologize for how you choose to survive. It’s not a deficiency or weakness on your part and you owe no one an explanation.
Please protect your heart, it needs extra understanding, protect your gentle soul and protect your emotions. Allow for days that only nourish you, that solely pamper and recharge you. You don’t have to be there for everyone else and give yourself the scraps that are left over at the end of the day. It’s ok to be tired and allow yourself rest. Don’t apologize or feel guilty for pampering yourself. You’ve gone through hell, you deserve it. You can play the Infertility card and do it without guilt. You will find that by letting go of any guilt, any comparison to others, and allowing for the self-care to be a part of your daily life choices, that it will give you an inner peace and strength that you’ve never felt before!
So, do be proud of yourself that you are fighting through all of this, which takes double your effort to try to hide. Do be proud that even on days when you wanted to stay in bed and shut off the world, you had the strength to get up and carry on. Do be proud that even in your own pain, you are always there for your sister in her darkest hour. Do be proud of the resiliency month after month. Be proud of staying (semi) sane through it all. 😉
Do be proud that you are an amazing human being. Now go do something for yourself! Let me know what it is!
Love, Miss.Conception Coach